Chapter 20

Chapter 20

...

I fiddled with my bow tie, pulling it loose before my fingers deftly manipulated and twisted it back into its original state. I pulled it taut, allowing the familiar motions to relax my nerves as I settled back into the seat of the limousine.

It wasn't to say that I was nervous per se, but there was no denying the tension hovering in the air around me. I took a deep breath, calming myself as I allowed the anticipation of what was to come rise.

I had talked extensively with Isabella, and she had been quick to make me realize that, while I had majority of the control over our situation, there was no guarantee as to when we would slip, causing us to lose our upper hand.

Tonight, at the annual charity masquerade ball, I would have my Bellezza on my arm. It was a small step in the right direction since her identity would still be withheld, but by slowly integrating her into the other half of my life as my girlfriend, lover, and partner, the news of me no longer being a bachelor would create less of a ripple in the water.

With guidance from my publicist and Tanya, we had worked to create the perfect set up. We would not be arriving together as there would a red carpet where photographers and reporters were bound to stop me to ask questions and take my picture. However, once inside the ball we would be reunited.

After that, she would stay on my arm for the rest of the evening. It would, of course, be apparent as to who I was, but our faces would be obscured by our masks, and that was something we could use to our advantage.

I would introduce her as my girlfriend, Isabella. Last names would raise too many questions, and I wasn't sure as to who I could and could not trust to keep that information away from the press.

I knew my mother and Carlisle would be in attendance. Not even their impending divorce could stop them from making an appearance to rubbing elbows with fellow socialites and politicians.

It was not something that I was looking forward to dealing with since I had blocked their number. I was content on moving on with my life without their poison infecting me.

In all honesty, these charity events had always been somewhat of a drag to me. I had always willingly given money for the causes I supported, but the events hosted were just another way for the rich to size each other up.

Women gossiped, shaking their heads at those who they deemed gave too little, citing them cheap and disgraceful. Then they would turn their noses up at those who thought gave too much, whispering among themselves how so and so was showing off.

They judged without repentance, grouped together like packs of wolves as they eyed their prey, ready to rip them apart.

It became a contest as to who could one up the other, completely demolishing the idea and spirit of giving selflessly to those less fortunate us. It was all about publicity, and it tended to wear on me.

I sighed, dropping my hands to my lap where they tapped a silent beat. The interior lights reflected the glint from my new cufflinks. Isabella, having listened to the explanation of why these events were tiring for me, had given me cufflinks shaped as the letter "P." She said it was to remind me, even when I had put on my facade as the upstanding Senator, of who I was.

Even now, I could feel the tension evaporating from my shoulders and an indulgent smile tugging at my lips.

"Edward, we're here," Tanya murmured, interrupting my thoughts.

I took a deep breath, squaring my shoulders as I watched the flashing lights through the window.

"Are you ready for this?" she asked while we waited for the driver to come around.

I nodded, meeting her gaze with one of determination. "Yes, as ready as I'll ever be.”

Anything she was about to say was cut off by the shouting and chatter from outside as the door was opened. Tanya's face hardened, ready to join me in battle as I allowed my facade to guide me out of the limousine, my trademark smirk on my lips as I waved to the crown.

I forced myself not to squint and flinch at the blinding lights as I waited for Tanya to exit. She followed me up the carpet at a distance, careful not to be in any of the shots taken, but close enough that if the reporters asked any questions I had forewarned as unapproved, she could step in, ushering me along to the next reporter.

After the exposure of my time in therapy, I had released a statement saying that not only was I upset over my civil and patient/doctor confidentiality rights being violated since my records were protected under the FOIP and HIPA regulations, but that the reasons for my time there were both personal and private, and held no bearing or effect in my service to my constituents, state, or country.

It had not stopped them from asking invasive questions about my sex life, questioning my sexual orientation to whether or not I was an eunuch. It was so ridiculous that I almost had to laugh.

In any other instance, I would have taken legal action and sued Dr. Brandon, but since I knew that she would never do something to hurt me or my reputation, I had settled on suing the receptionist that had leaked the information.

Tanya had wanted me to take her to court and bleed every penny from her, but to stave off any more publicity concerning the subject, I had done it quickly and quietly. I wanted the whole thing to be in the past, and making a huge deal out of it would only add fuel to the fire that was already burning brightly.

I talked and answered questions from reporters, careful to skirt around the subject everyone was dying to talk about, while keeping a smile firmly fixed on my face. I doubted I would ever quite understand what was so riveting about my private life, but they all seemed rather hung up on it.

I was ready to leave by the time we made it inside, my eyes sore from the constant flashing lights. I heaved out a long sigh, my hands twitching to run through my neat hair.

"I'll go find Isabella," Tanya murmured, turning with a swish of her floor length turquoise sequined dress that reminded me somewhat of a mermaid's tail, and disappeared through a side door.

I gave my cufflinks a quick glance, gearing myself up for what was going to be an exhausting night, placed my simple black with a silver pattern mask on my face, and entered the ballroom.

Laughter and chatter greeted my ears, along the soft strands of the quartet band and clinking of champagne glasses.

"Ah, Senator!" A voice called out, and I was relieved to see that it was Mayor Benjamin Cheney with his wife, Angela.

"Mayor Cheney, Mrs. Cheney," I said politely.

He waved me off. "Enough with the formalities, Edward, my boy. I want to know when you're going to join me out on the green again. I want a chance to earn back some of my hard earned cash that you cheated me out of," he joked, the wrinkles by his mouth deepening.

I smiled at him. Benjamin and I had been golf buddies since I had come into office. He had helped guide me through some of the more complicated aspects of being in public office, including tips on how to keep my private life private.

"Ben, you and I both know that I won that money fair and square. It isn't my fault that my arm is a lot stronger than yours. I think your age is finally showing," I teased.

He let out a guffaw. "Ah, Cullen, you always knew how to deliver a blow while charming the pants of people at the same time. That, my friend, is a gift you don't want to be throwing away easily.”

I smiled, but was distracted by a brief flash of green entering my vision on the far right.

I wasn't sure how I knew, but the way her dress—a forest green, chiffon, one-shouldered, floor length dress—hugged every curve before flowing over her legs made it impossible for me not to know who it was.

Mask or no mask, I'd had those legs wrapped around my waist too many times not to recognize them in those strappy, silver heels that made them look as if they went on for miles.

Her hair fell in perfect curls around her face, framing it as she walked in my direction, her hips swaying with each movement.

It was quite clear that I was not the only one who had noticed her arrival, but her eyes stayed glued to mine as she came toward me. I smiled when I saw that she was wearing the earrings I had given her earlier that night as a gift.

I had actually been rather nervous, unsure as to whether or not she would like them, or if they would match her clothes. They were, while not understated, less ostentatious than what I would usually buy for her.

That didn't lower the price any, but the look on her face when she saw the dark silver and diamond chandelier earrings was enough to put any fears to rest. It was safe to say that she loved them, and I would have paid any amount of money in the world to get her to smile like she did.

It seemed like mere seconds passed before she was at my side, a coy smile on her lips as she wrapped an arm around my waist.

"You look like a goddess," I murmured as I gave her a chaste kiss before turning back to Ben, my hand placed possessively on the small of her back, subtly stating my claim on her.

"Ben, Angela, I want you to meet my girlfriend, Isabella.”

They were surprised, but greeted Isabella readily, Angela being quick to comment on her dress. I was not shocked by their surprise because—in the past—when I had brought a date, I had always been a little distant toward them and not overly affectionate.

I was pleased at how smoothly the transition of her into this part of my life was, but sadly, it didn't last as long as I hoped.

"Edward," my mother called out, making her way with Carlisle toward us. I grudgingly excused myself and Isabella from Ben and Angela, squaring my shoulders against what was about to commence.

I could feel the eyes of the gossips on me already as my mother smiled in almost a nervous fashion.

"Who is this lovely lady on your arm?" she asked, not bothering to even start with the formality of asking how I had been. I bit back a dry, sarcastic remark, feeling Isabella squeeze my side comfortingly.

"Mother, this lovely lady is Isabella, my girlfriend," I told her.

"How do you do, Mrs. Cullen?" Isabella asked politely, offering her hand. My mother shook Isabella's hand, a look of suspicion on her face.

"How come this is the first I'm are hearing about you?" she demanded. "I think something like this would demand at least a little bit of warning beforehand. How will I be able to look Mrs. Stanley in the eye now when I have told her you were single? Her daughter was really looking forward to meeting you tonight.”

I clenched my jaw tightly as Isabella rubbed soothing circles into my side. Her complete disrespect and selfishness obviously knew no bounds. I actually found myself rather happy with my decision to cut her from my life. Any amount of wavering or uncertainty that had filled me in the past was wiped clean.

"Maybe you would have known if you took the time to actually talk with me," I said, my voice eerily calm.

She pursed her lips. "I haven't been able to get through to you," she admitted, reminding me of the fact that I had blocked all of her calls.

"With good reason. Until you and Carlisle stop trying to push your wants and dreams onto me, then I understandably do not want any contact with you. My life is my own, and until you realize that, then we have absolutely nothing to talk about. Now, if you'll excuse us.”

I quickly guided Isabella away from them, my heart pounding in my chest and my hands shaking slightly. Even though I had not raised my voice, or caused a scene, I knew that tonight had been the final nail in the coffin concerning my relationship with my mother.

I wasn't even sure as to where I was going until I found myself out on one of the balconies, the cool night air brushing over my skin as I inhaled deeply. I clenched my eyes shut, grasping the metal railing before as I tried to regain control over myself. My chest seemed to have exploded with pain, radiating and traveling throughout my veins. My breaths came out in quick pants as I tried to swallow, my throat feeling closed up as I tugged my mask from my face.

It felt as though my tongue had swelled up, and my saliva had turned into acid. Fire burned and scorched my skin, the flames licking and dancing on the edge of my senses.

It was as though an overwhelming feeling of loss had overtaken me, like a death had occurred. It was as though the rug had been swept from beneath my feet, leaving me sprawling, too numb to react properly.

My faith in humanity and the world itself dwindled before my eyes, and I was left with unanswerable question of why.

"Papi, look at me," Isabella demanded, her voice bringing me back from the darkness. The shadows retreated, allowing glimmers of light to spring forth like hope, tentatively spreading without anything to actively guard it.

She grasped my face between her hands, turning my face in her direction. "You're not alone," she told me sternly. "I love you.”

My body seemed to deflate with her words, and I drew her into my arms, burying my face into the side of her neck. "Fuck," I whispered, willing the tears springing up to disappear.

My body urged me to go into survival mode, begging me to protect myself from the pain and hurt, but I didn't allow it. I couldn't block this out and pretend that I was fine when I clearly wasn't. I needed a few minutes to digest this before I could even contemplate walking back into that ball.

She rocked me, scratching her nails gently at the base of my neck, soothing me. "You're okay, Papi," she murmured.

I let out a shuddering breath, forcing myself to pull back from the sanctuary that was her arms. I tipped my head back, clenching my hands by my side as I let it all fall away, compartmentalizing it and storing it away to go over later. My shoulders were set, my body loosening its tense pose as I spread my legs shoulder width apart.

Determination grounded me. Confidence made my stance firm. I reminded myself of who I was—in and out of the public eye—and grasped onto that knowledge, letting it take hold of my mind.

I saw, rather than heard, her breath hitch, her chest lifting up as her eyes met my dark gaze.

I took a step toward her, grasping her waist and yanking her to me so that her body was flush to mine. I pulled her mask away from her face, my hands caressing the apples of her cheeks before pulling her lips roughly to mine. The kiss was harsh, deep, passionate, and─most of all─dominating.

I pushed her back into the railing, my teeth nipping at her lips as she dug her nails into back of my tux jacket.

I tore my mouth away from hers once the need to breath consumed me, my breathing heavy, and the fire kindling in my stomach expanding. I rested my forehead against hers, my arms wrapped securely around her waist.

"We are going to go back in there, we are going to donate money, we are going to rub elbows with a load of people who probably won't remember your name by tomorrow, and then we are going home where I'm going to ravage you can't remember your own name . Any objections?" I demanded.

She shook her head, her pupils dilated. "No, Papi," she breathed.

My mind settled at her acquiesce, the buzzing becoming background noise until I could sate my desire for her, her submission setting me free from the restraints that held me down.

I let out a long sigh, praying for the night to slip by quickly. "Let's do this.”

...

I couldn't keep my hands off her. By the time the door to our apartment closed behind us, my hands were clutching her fleshy hips as I pulled her flush into me, feeling every inch of her body.

The small lamp by the door cast a warm glow of light across the hall, but my focus stayed on her. She blinked as my breath washed over her face, my mouth mere inches from hers. A shudder ran through me as she snaked a hand beneath my tux jacket, the heat of her fingers sinking through my shirt and burning my skin.

Her lips parted as she tilted her face up further, bringing our lips even closer, yet not quite touching.

"Let go," she whispered, her eyes falling closed as she raised her free hand to grasp my shoulder.

I swallowed tightly, feeling the weight of everything I had held back all night crash down around me. My knees almost buckled from the sheer emotion that flooded me, a choked cry escaping me. My hand shook as I raised it, diving it in her hair and fisting a handful of it as I dragged her mouth to mine.

I poured everything that I felt into that kiss, every crippling, painful feeling that gripped me was conveyed as my mouth dominated hers. Her lips yielded beneath the force of mine, her tongue caressing mine as I plundered her mouth.

I was sure she could feel my awakened cock against the soft skin of her stomach, pulsing and hard in its want, but I found no embarrassment in it, if anything, I reveled in the knowledge that she could feel just what she did to me.

The hand on her hip slid back, finding purchase on the firm, round flesh of her ass, squeezing and massaging it as I stumbled forward, pushing her down the hall.

I wasn't under the misconception that we would make it anywhere near our room anytime soon, but I wanted to have at least some sort of flat surface that wasn't the wall.

Teeth clashed in our desire for more, always more, and she yanked my tux jacket from my shoulders, pushing it to the floor as I pressed her into the back of the couch in the living room.

Our mouths broke apart, the need to breath taking over our passion briefly. My lips hunted down her jaw to her neck as she fumbled with the buttons of my shirt, little sighs and moans leaving her as I lowered the hand that had been in her hair to the supple curve of her left tit.

I fondled her, manipulating her body over the flimsy material of her dress like potter would his clay.

Her nails raked over my skin as she ripped my shirt from my body, forcing me to retreat my touch to undo my cufflinks. They clattered to the ground, releasing my shirt from my body, leaving my upper half bare.

I spun her body around so that her back was to me, her chest arching as I swept her hair off her shoulder. My lips caressed the bare skin of her back, traveling down until I was on my knees behind her, my teeth gripping the zipper placed just above the small of her back.

My hand trailed up the slit on the side of her dress, my fingers grazing her thigh as my teeth pulled down the zipper achingly slow, my nose skimming along the curve of her ass in my descent.

My fingers continued on their path upwards, palming her bare hip as I released her zipper, leaning my forehead against her back. I tried to regain some semblance of control over my body as the realization that she had been completely naked underneath her dress all night hit me.

I rose to my feet, my breathing harsh as I gripped each strap of her dress and dragged them down her arms. Her dress offered no resistance as it dropped, pooling around her ankles while I let my hands wrap around her body, my fingers teasing the skin of her stomach.

She whimpered as they brushed against the underside of her plump tits, and I brought my mouth to her ear. "I want to see you. I want to see all of you," I hissed, spinning her around to face me.

My eyes mapped her skin, the moon's subtle light making her skin pale. I felt like a thirsty man having his first drop of water in months as she rested her hands on the couch behind her, arching her back forward as her chest heaved, her body completely naked save the heels on her feet. She was majestic in her beauty, her skin glowing as she offered herself freely to me.

Her body was a temple upon which I was eager to worship, and I felt the intense need inside me simmer down slightly.

Her skin was satiny smooth under my hands as they danced over her hips, hoisting her up to sit on the back of the couch. I moved to stand between her parted thighs, her arms dragging me to meld my lips with hers once more. Her lips were wet and warm as they moved with mine in synchronization, almost as though she could read my thoughts and responded to them accordingly.

"Please, no more. I need you," she pleaded, her body trembling, and I felt the tempered down need flare back up in my chest. I palmed her supple tits, pinching and palming her nipples to provoke cries of pleasure from her swollen lips.

I planted wet, open-mouthed kisses along her jaw before kissing the skin behind her ear softly. One of my hands dipped down between her legs, my fingers sweeping along the length of her pussy lips as she bucked into it, moaning wantonly.

Her head fell to my shoulder as I parted her folds, spreading her open before allowing my fingers to stroke her needy flesh. Her nails dug into my back as she shifted against my hand, her hips rolling forward as I rubbed circles around her clit. Her breath was hot against my neck, whimpers and mewls of pleasure escaping her as I nudged her toward her climax.

I used my free hand to draw random patterns on her back, reminding that I was here as I pushed two fingers into her entrance. She tensed before relaxing back into me, her walls clinging to my fingers as I thrust them in and out of her.

"You were so beautiful tonight," I whispered to her as if I were sharing a secret.

"A goddess among mere mortals." My tongue flicked out, running over the curve of her ear. 

"You held the attention of every man in that ballroom. I bet they were all hard for you, pulsing with need to see just a little more of your creamy skin...”

Her breathing stuttered as I twisted my fingers, grazing her g-spot, and her nails dug deeper into my skin. "...I could feel them undressing you with their eyes, begging in their minds for the slit of your dress to be higher, to show them the soft, pink mound of your pussy.”

I one-handedly attempted to release myself from my pants as she writhed in my arms, moaning and trembling as I continued speaking to her. "But they can't, and they never will.

 You're mine, your pussy is mine, your body is mine, and I'll be damned if I'm going to share you. You're mine. You belong to me, and right now you're going to be a good little girl and cum all over my fingers," I told her.

There was a pause, the balance of time hanging, teetering back and forth before it crashed back down.

"Yours!" she cried out, shattering around my fingers, her body quivering as she came. I hissed as her teeth clamped down on my neck, muffling her sounds of ecstasy. Her hands clawed at me, trying to grasp onto my skin as I pushed my pants down my legs along with my boxers, finally releasing my weeping cock. I groaned lowly, my head a haze of lust as I stepped forward, letting her feel my erection pushing impatiently against her thigh.

I waited until she came back down from her orgasm before spreading her thighs open wide, her juices glisten on her pink, swollen flesh. I guided my cock between her folds, rubbing it up and down her pussy, coating it in her juices. She loosened her hold on me, her chest heaving as she let her head fall back, her eyes closed and lips parted.

"Yes," she slurred as she shifted her hips closer. "Please, baby." The endearment rolled off her tongue easily, and I pressed myself at her entrance before easing my way into her body, pushing against the resistance until I was buried to the hilt. She bit down on her lip harshly, stopping the flow of blood as I sat deep inside her, our bodies fused together.

Her eyelids were heavy as she peered up at me from underneath them, her body flushed and sweating from her earlier orgasm. "I love you," she whispered, threading her hands through my hair as she reached up, craning her neck so that she could find completeness in my lips.

My arms wrapped around her body, cupping the soft cheeks of her ass as I drew her even closer to me. Our mouths moved slowly against each other, neither of us in a hurry to deepen it as I pulled my hips back before sliding back inside her.

She whimpered against my mouth, her lips parting as she breathed into my mouth. I rested my forehead against hers, my lips pulling back slightly, letting them rest softly against hers until we were no longer kissing, just breathing each other in.

The dark, shadowed background of our coupling seemed to fit the mood, the moon's dim light guiding us. Her breathing stuttered, and her grip on my hair tightened as I gave her everything I had with each thrust.

My lips brushed against her cheek, the skin warm and soft as I let them follow their own path upward. I peppered kisses all over her face, my hips leaving only to greet her once again, the slick sounds of sex resounding in the quiet among the soft moans and whimpers.

In that moment, standing between her thighs, her legs wrapped tightly around my waist as she dug the heels of her shoes into my ass, there was nothing but her. The stress, the hurt and the pain that had buzzed beneath the surface of my skin all night vanished as if it had never existed in the first place.

My responsibilities, my job, my burden, dropped slowly from my shoulders like an unwanted garment. There was no room for any of it in our moment. Only she was allowed to exist in it, her small body clinging to me as if she were a drowning woman, and I was her raft. She let out a small, choked sob, a lone tear falling down her cheek.

"I-I can't," she stuttered, her muscles tensing as she fought against the feelings I was pouring into her.

"Shhh," I whispered, kissing away her tear. "Feel me.”

She swallowed tightly, scrunching her eyes closed tightly. "It's too much," she whimpered, trembling in my arms.

I reached up, cupping her face in my hand, stroking her cheek in what I hoped was a soothing manner. "Don't think," I told her, my hips intensifying their pace. "Just feel me." Each thrust was deep and slow as I slowly brought us close to the edge. I crushed my mouth to hers, wasting no time in plunging my tongue into her mouth. The kiss was wet and harsh as I spared no mercy.

I wanted her to know, to feel, what words couldn't adequately explain.

She shuddered, her whole body shaking as she responded, giving me as much intensity as what I gave her. I rejoiced as she let every defense down, leaving herself vulnerable and raw under my fingers.

Neither of us hid, we didn't need to.

Our bodies, hearts and souls were bared, exposed to one another in an ultimate show of trust. We held nothing back as the tension mounted. Teeth crashed together as we attempted to get as close as humanly possible, the passion radiating from us in waves.

It was almost painful, the emotions coursing through me, too much, yet not enough. It pulled me back and forth, clawing at me as I tried to convey how I felt to her in actions rather than words.

Tears glistened in her eyes, threatening to spill down her cheeks as I tried to steady myself, my fingers flexing against her ass. I could feel sweat trickling down my neck, my skin hot and flushed as it connected with hers, our chests pushed flush together. Her nipples were hard and pebbled against my chest as they slid up and down, her hips rolling forward as they greeted my own, grinding together.

Everything felt stilted and crooked. It was hard to aptly explain how the world seemed to shift as though a new perspective had been created and given to me. It was infinitely more.

More of her.

More of me.

More of us.

"Edward," she breathed against my skin, drawing my mind deeper into the essence that was her. It sort of didn't make sense how I felt, but if there was anything that you could learn about love, it was that it tended not to have a logical answer.

It wasn't scientific—something that could be chartered and contained—it was faith, belief, hope, it was the ultimate expression of feeling. You couldn't get higher than love. It was an unstoppable force that waited for no man to come to terms with.

I could tell she was getting close, and I forced myself to hold back and wait for her. My muscles strained and burned with impatience as I let a hand drift between us, pressing against her clit.

"Cum with me, Mia Bellezza, let go," I urged, the strands of my control slipping through my fingers as the heat exploded inside me, my cock pulsing. My rhythm on her clit faltered as my orgasm took over, but I had done what I had needed to.

She cried out hoarsely, throwing her head back and arching her chest forward as she fell of the precipice, sinking into ecstasy.

Nothing was more glorious than watching her in the throes of passion, powerless to fight against the sensations running through her body. Sparks of tension flew around us like a train attempting to grind to a halt.

We tripped and fell, skidding down the slippery slope and into the cool water of euphoria. Waves of lust slammed against us, tossing us heedlessly among them.

I throbbed and pulsed, my cock emptying inside her body as she milked me, her walls contracting around me, her muscles fluttering.

It took everything in me not to collapse, not to let my legs give out under me as I came down from my high, my face buried in her neck, inhaling her scent to ground me.

She ran her hands through my hair softly as I wrapped my arms around her waist, holding her tight to me before lifting her up off the couch. We were silent as I carried her upstairs to our room, not caring about the clothes strewn across the apartment.

I brought us straight into my en suite, setting her down on the edge of the counter, my softening cock slipping out of her body easily. I worked quietly, taking a wet cloth and running it over myself to wipe away some of the sweat before rinsing it.

I didn't have enough energy to shower, but didn't want to climb into my clean bed all sweaty.

I raised the cloth to her face, wiping the sweat from her forehead as she wrapped her arms around my neck, her legs swinging in a hypnotizing rhythm. The need to nurture and care for was strong inside me as I washed her arms and hands before moving onto her torso.

I skipped her pussy, leaving it until last as I grasped her right foot in my hand, carefully sliding her heel off it before massaging the skin. I repeated my actions on the other foot before spreading her thighs.

I cleaned the cum dripping from her pussy, washing away the evidence of our activities.

Once I was satisfied that she was clean, I retreated into the bedroom, pulling on a pair of sleep pants as I brought one of my t-shirts and a pair of panties to her. She had a few drawers in my room of her stuff, and it felt oddly nice to have a mixture of us in there.

She yawned, raising her hands up high as I slid the t-shirt over her head, her natural instinct to let me care for her. I helped her into her panties before carrying her into the bedroom, pulling the covers back before tucking her in beside me.

She rested her head against my chest, slipping a leg between mine to tangle them together.

"I love you, Edward," she murmured sleepily.

"Ti amo, mia bella, ti amo.